The Robertons of Earnock, in the parish of Hamilton, were one of the oldest families in that part of the country, and could trace their origin to a more remote antiquity than many of the noble families in their neighbourhood. The last of these Lairds, who died upwards of fifty years ago, was noted for many good qualities, not unmixed with some eccentricities. Among the latter of these, was a strange fondness for hunting-dogs, which he permitted to roam at large, and to live at bed and board with himself ; and generally from twenty to thirty might be seen following him on his peregrinations around the country, or, if at home, snugly dosing around him on the hearth. Among the then pendicles attached to this strange establishment, was a family fool named Robert McMath, who was perhaps the last of his species in Scotland. His neighbour, Captain Gilchrist, of Eddlewood the maternal grandfather of the celebrated Lord Cochrane, now Earl Dundonald, frequently rallied him on these points, but in vain ; the Laird of Earnock was incurable; but at the same time, he did not think less of his kind-hearted neighbour and disinterested adviser, and, accordingly, various small marks of attention and of mutual regard frequently passed between the two families, of which the following is an instance :__The Laird of Earnock had on one occasion a large litter of pigs of a very superior breed, and as he wished to send a couple of them to Captain Gilchrist, Robin the fool was instantly dispatched with them in a pock which he carried over his shoulders, with directions to say to the family at Eddlewood, that they were ” From the Laird of Earnock, and would serve for a roast, or to amuse the weans. ” The weans at this time were Lord Cochrane and his brother. The distance between Earnock house and Eddlewood is about two miles ; and as ill luck would have it, a party from Hamilton happened on the same day to be playing at quoits, and dining at a small public-house about half-way between the two mansion-houses. When Robin was seen approaching with his burden on his back, they instantly ” smelled a rat ; ” and having persuaded him to go in and take a drink of swipes or ale, they in the mean time took out the two pigs, and placed two pups in their place ; and having helped Robin on with his burden, sent him on his way rejoicing. On arriving at Eddlewood, he met Captain Gilchrist himself, where, having done so, he was confounded to see two pups, instead of two pigs, make their debut. Captain Gilchrist thinking it was a joke of his friend, ordered Robin to repack his charge, and carry them back to his master. When Robin reached the fatal public-house on his return home, he was again enticed to go in ; and while he was partaking of another refreshment, the pigs were re-placed and the dogs taken out, when the simple dupe was despatched as formerly. On his arrival at Earnock, he began to upbraid the Laird for having sent him on so fruitless an errand ; when, being ordered again to ” turn them out, ” to his infinite amazement and consternation, the dogs had again become pigs. His master, having questioned him where he had been, saw through the trick, ordered him again to get the pigs on his back, and to be sure and never set them down till he reached Eddlewood ; but Robin was refractory , and made of as qiuckly as possible, remarking, with a shrug of the shoulder and a significant leer of the eye, ” Na, na, maister, I’ve carried the Deil lang enough ; you may carry him a bit yoursel noo. “
The anecdote above is an excerpt from the book titled;
” THE LAIRD OF LOGAN: OR, ANECDOTES AND TALES ILLUSTRATIVE OF THE WIT AND HUMOUR OF SCOTLAND. By John Donald Carrick, &Co. c. 1845 “.
The family fool ” Robert McMath ” is later referred to as ” Robin ” in the story. The original name of the public-house mentioned in the story was ” The Ale House ” and it is now known as ” Guys Inn “, at 93 Meikle Earnock Road, Hamilton, South Lanarkshire Scotland ML3 8AG.
Transcribed And Republished By
Hamilton Historian.
Terence (Terry) Murphy.
Ref; The Laird Of Logan Book (details listed above).